Hope !

One day all will be good,

One day there will be sun only for you,

One day your hard work will be paid,

One day you get your love,

One day the morning will be happy, the evening will be peaceful,

One day nobody is there to humiliate you,

One day……

When is the One day,

When the wait is done,

When I have Not all, but a little bit….

I am pray for that Day…

God give me that One day, only for one day,

But please let me feel Alive for One day.

Bird in the nest !

I live in the apartment no trees around. Nowadays, it’s hard to see birds in the nest and impossible for my kid to see any bird in the nest. For him, birds fly or live in cages 😦 . Luckily on my balcony, a bird makes the nest. My husband said, “We must stop the bird. Otherwise there will be eggs, and if eggs fall then, that hearts me” he is right. Still, I promise him to take care of the bird and my son, so birdy and my monkey don’t disturb each other. Since the bird making her nest, each day is different for me. The more I am with her, the more I feel connected. It amazes me the complete process of Motherhood, whether it’s a bird or human. It’s God’s gift πŸ™‚ . I thought, let’s give words to that feeling.

My balcony is full of plants maybe that attract the bird. She keeps coming and sitting for hours. After three-four days, I notice that she is making a nest. What a fine architect she is. She gave proper support to the nest as it is only on one thin base and tightly tied with the iron bars and makes it safe as much as possible. In 6 to 7 days, she completes it. When I see her making the nest, getting all the soft stuff for would-be babies, I remember those days How I was preparing my baby’s nursery.

Nest is all ready…

The nest is all ready, and she did not move at all. I realized that she laid eggs. She flies away for some time then comes back, she won’t go too far, whenever I reach my balcony she comes back from nowhere. I can understand her, she is going to be a mother, and for now, her only job is to take care of herself and her babies. Sometimes I see another bird with her, and that one comes only to give her food. My son called that bird a dady bird, who flies away because he goes office. During my pregnancy, my husband used to do the same thing before leaving for the office, he arranged all of my stuff in an easy-access way. He never forgets about my craving stuff and baby carrot. Human or animal, End of the day, we are parents.

Eggs are hatching, and a tiny winy cute birdy is out. That’s the most beautiful moment. My kid is so happy, all day he is shouting. Every single time when the bird is out for food, he climbs up and starts looking at the babies. Now we have names Mumma bird, a baby bird, and a dada bird. Now Mumma bird comes with food, and babies open their mouths in the air for the food. Nobody teaches them what to do, but they know, just like the first time I feed my baby, and he knows what to do. At my time, I had this question, how my newborn knows to have milk, and my doctor says, don’t worry about that. After a half-hour of delivery, I nursed my baby, and that was the most satisfying feeling. I get it there are things which we don’t need to teach.

Now my morning starts with them. They chirping early in the morning. It’s so calming, peaceful, wake up like that. I am not an early riser, but now birdies are my alarm, and without snooze, I wake up and have tea with them. Baby birds are growing too fast, and now they are big and have no space for Mumma. When the Mumma bird is not in the nest, babies try to jump. That scares me, so I can imagine how scary for the Mumma bird. I observe one thing whenever Mumma bird is out for food, she keeps chirping so the baby bird can hear her, it’s my assumption, but with that sound, at least the babies don’t try to jump. When I see the naughty baby birds, that give me a sense The moment kids start feeling independence, they start their things, and being a parent our job is to keep saying No word. So I think Mumma bird is doing the same when she is not in the nest but keeps making a sound from far away πŸ˜›.

Baby birds

Birds are ready to fly, and soon they will be in the sky and leave their empty nest behind with their sweet memories. I am gone miss them. I can feel what the Mumma bird will feel. I correlate myself with her, a baby born, you raised him with all your love and care, one day he flies away that’s what you teach him, but in your deep heart you want to stop that, you want to hold the moment, you wish that your love one grows slow but it never going to happen they grows fast and now ready to fly. It’s a happy moment that your loved one is now in the world on their own you taught him well, A proud Parent, and sad because now they are not with you. I have no words to explain that feeling. I can only feel it. The day you become a parent, you assuredly feel it. With this feeling, I want to enjoy every single moment with my son.

Thanks to God, he gave us such a beautiful life and such beautiful emotion. When you feel it, you realize how pure the parents and kid relation is. It’s a responsibility, and God blessed us with that. Newborn to a flying bird, every moment is precious. When your little one reaches the sky, that’s the moment you feel proud and say, We did well.

What matters Effort or Result

Effort or Result. Which is Better. Some of you believe in Results, and some say Effort, and others think If you don’t put in your efforts, how you will achieve. There are lots of Prospective and never-ending debates. The question is how I come up with this idea. It comes from my daily jobs πŸ˜‰ .My husband and I have a little hot discussion about my son’s habits. I was telling him that when he writes, he needs to try to make it good, my husband suggesting that At least he is writing, and I should appreciate him. I told him that there is no denying his efforts. If he is learning writing, so put it in a way, he gets good handwriting. What is the purpose of work if you don’t get the desired result? So we come up with the Thought that I am a Result believer and my husband is Effort. (My kid was watching TV without any clue πŸ˜‰ ).

After that, our discussion ends, How our son is going to learn writing is still unclear, but at least we two come up with something πŸ˜‰ .

It gives me a thought, which one is the better way because this is everywhere, whatever you do it needs the same concept. I go with the Result-based thinking :

  • Result-based thinking gives you a clear picture of what you want to achieve. Accordingly, you can decide your efforts. Everyone wants their own house, so they work, save and try to get it.
  • With this thinking, you can make plans, timeline. You need to write a blog, plan your topic, do some research and start your work. Yeah, It can be extended but not forever.
  • As per the objective, you can analyze your work. after revisiting, you can make it right if something goes wrong. As Software engineers, Testers know what they want to achieve, and they work towards that. When they feel the development is not on track, they revise it.
  • Setting your efforts towards your goal encourage you. Without aim, at a certain point, you can be lost. Think about Football, players kick the ball towards the goal, so it’s fun. Now you say kick but no goal. Then what is the point of using muscles? 
  • You have a Goal, plan, timeline then you work accordingly. It helps you to find out your capacity.

Now Effort based thinking, if you are the person who concentrates on Efforts rather than Result so :

  • The Best example is Doctors. They put all their efforts into saving patients without knowing the outcome. we must be thankful for them.
  • Soldiers fight for us. They fight until they win or die, no time frame.
  • Having this perspective, you have your goal, and working hard for that now doesn’t matter when you achieve it. Like Scientists, they are doing a great job, but they work like this way. They put their 100% and keep working for new inventions. Sometimes get it, sometimes it takes years. Nobody knows the time frame.
  • When you put in work, you get to experience here you have no time frame, you trying new ways which open all your doors.

When your hard work pays nothing, then at someplace you lose track, you give up. Sometimes you are bored. But the same way, you keep thinking about results, then you never try a new way. Both have their pros and cons.

The only thing which is not good with results-based is “Achiever is the Hero” Nobody knows your name if you don’t win the race. Then What about efforts, Put all your efforts into achieving the goal and could not make it. You are not in the winning zone. That’s not fair with the person who puts all his efforts, deserves appreciation. No doubt the winner gets the reward with that the person who put efforts must be recognizable.

I admire Result-based thinking but would like to praise The Effort. Effort leads somewhere either towards Goal or lifetime ExperienceOthers Effort inspires you.

Efforts Vs Result.
Picture is from my garden, Effort and Result.

Crying allowed ?

When you cry, that doesn’t mean you are weak. Crying is another emotion which we need to let it go, yes crying is also good therapy for healing specially emotional healing.

What would happen if you don’t cry, first we need to understand when we want to cry, something which heart us deeply and we know nothing we can do to make it right, that’s the moment we feel cry like breakup, fail in exam something like that. Everybody has their own reasons, but we always says crying is not the solution, But Some time crying is the Solution.

You know the First cry of a baby, that cry helps him breath outside of womb very first time, that helps to clear extra fluid from his lungs, mouth and nose. Baby express everything with the cry hungry, sleepy, need attention everything. It’s fact after crying baby sleep calmly.

Crying helps to reduce the stress, when you cry lots of chemical reactions happen and with the tears they relies, in general terms when we cry everything is out. You get rid of that blue feeling. As tears moving out with that you feel relief. Once your all stress gone, you see the clear picture, you have clear thoughts.

What’s the harm in that, women cry a lot, world wide fact, they are emotional and they express it. if you see heart attack ratio men vs women, then men in danger zone. Men and women both have stress but women cry, they overcome with that, but men don’t, At certain point you need to get rid of your stress otherwise it start affecting your health.

I am not saying cry for everything, but if your tear is coming out don’t stop them. Let them flow, they do magic after they all finished, you feel stress free. That relief is the most important. Don’t think about anybody, what others think if you cry, it’s not your concern, your concern is your self. If you cry, you are not loser, instead of that you are brave, you are letting out your emotions and then you know how to deal with them.

So you tell me which is better way feel frustrated and don’t know what to do Or with clear mind chose your next move. Choice is all yours. emotion is the thing which we need to express, we can express happiness why not that blue one.

If you want to cry, cry alone, cry on some body shoulder, but let it out. Don’t say to your kid that “Don’t cry ” teach them how to handle the emotions. When I look around this New generation does not know how to express the emotions, what to do during the blue days.

My 4 year old says that his father can not see him when he is crying, I am trying to figure it out where did he learn this concept but now he learnt and I need to teach him opposite (I have daily New challenges) currently I don’t know how I will explain him but surely I will do that.

We need to make our next generation strong, specially emotionally strong, I am sure we can do together, with little efforts and lots of understanding.

When your tears out you can see the world with the prospective.
It’s my balcony view.

Who you are !

It’s quite interesting question, Who you are ? Did you ever try to find yourself or you go with the flow. The way life is moving and you are sitting in the boat , Never try in opposite direction of stream.

When you try upstream, you will figure out how world treat you, it’s true if you are with downstream, as per the people, you are a right person but in otherwise you are odd men out.

Why, because you are trying something which is off the book, that’s not allowed.

When you try to find your self, you need to go through lots of up and downs like river rafting, you have a good upbringing with the same rule book, now you are in the way where you are opposing the rule book with your new logics, At that moment you are fighting with yourself, with the world and you are all alone who has paddle. That’s call Life on adventure.

People has same thinking regardless of place, a simple example I belive men and women are same there is no difference, both earn, both take care of family, both are achivers but in society that’s not the fect, yes they treat you same but when it come for decision then it’s men oriented.you can experience at any place in your home, in you work place every where. Even there is term Men Igo, why can’t women has Igo πŸ˜› So when you behave like that way, you are odd men out. That’s our book, we got this idea like default one.we don’t want to pass on our kids but they get that.

I have other example kid gets father feature, it feel good but when kid is looking like mother still he gets, that you have father feature, offcourse with mother father 50 50 kid is here 100 percent so he get both them. Why only father feature. When I says this, I am the person who doesn’t know how to reply on comment or I am disrespecting. But why, if someone talking about my kid so I have full rights to answer him, how I am disrespecting Because I am not accepting what he is saying. That’s the way people think about you.

You are good person, you help everyone regardless of thier behaviour towards to you, but still you are in bad list because you are driving opposite the flow.

That’s why I said you can find true you, true friends,true lover whenever you drive the boat in upstream. Choice is yours. I tried I get it, it’s hard but worth to do.

Brother Sister ! The amazing Relationship

In India we celebrate The Rakhi festival you can say as Brother Sister day, where Sister tie a thread on Brother’s hand and Brother promise her To protect her. ( Life long bodyguard )

Illustration Of Brother And Sister Celebrating Raksha Bandhan Royalty Free  Cliparts, Vectors, And Stock Illustration. Image 14504611.

I have three brothers, my childhood is little complicated but when I recall time with brothers it was always amazing. We used to fight, fight a lot. Even still if we are in a room after some time we started again. We never agree at one point although we let it go things but never agree, that’s the beauty of this relationship You are not agree with each other Still you are Together. You always have your back no matter what happen.

You got friend when you start going out, but the day you born or your sibling you get a friend. He or she knows you Truly. You have all emotions love, jealous, frustration(it’s your sibling who introduced you with this feeling).

Think about it, you need motherly care or you want girl suggestion who is your first thought It’s Your Sister. you want somebody to protact you like father, but don’t want any restrictions like father who is your Men, Your Brother. That’s the Brother and Sister. Substitute of Mother and Father but without any No word, Without any asking just Be with you and Done. You can share anything with them.

I want this amazing feeling for my son, we decided to have only one kid So I always wonder how can I express this feeling to him, Thanks to god my sister-in-law blessed with cute little princess, the day she born I feel my kid got his best gift for his life. He called her little sister and He called him self Big Brother. He loves her, he was 4 year old when she born, he is soo frightened to touch her. He said I could heart her she is soo tiny. When first time he touch her, he uses his one figure only and said to me ‘Amma See She is happy’. When ever she cries he angry on me. To see them together I have no words for them, like my kid is 4 and she is newborn but still when they are together they know each other. At that day I realized That Emotion you can not express it, you can only feel it.

Brother Meets Sister - Imgur

New Blogger

I like to google, I googled everything, everybody do that, at some or other point. when I googled things and read them I realize there are lots of people they like to share their experiences and those experiences are inspiration for others. Sharing the Thoughts how beautiful it is πŸ™‚ .

With this idea I decided to share my thoughts, at first it was a bit scary for me, I question my self who will read me and why they read. Then I though lets give it a try, Nothing to lose πŸ˜‰

When ever I publish my blog I keep checking, Is there any body who read it πŸ˜‰ I feel triumph when ever I got single like, that inspire me to write more, yes being a new blogger it is the most amazing feeling that some body reading you, it may be he does not like it, may be he like it But he is reading you. That gives really different felling and encourage me to try new things.

Really thankful to blogger community who helps me to learn, to grow, to inspire. Being a new blogger it is scary thought for me that What if nobody like my writing but when I publish my first blog and the response it was not that much huge but for me it’s really a amazing. Thank you for accepting me as a part of you.


The Time

Hello, How are you. Since I restarted the blogging, its the longest period that nothing new pop up in my mind. even my husband asked me that you did’t blog any thing new and I gave him simple reason that “I did’t get The Time”.

Is it really true that I am not getting time or I am delaying my self with some excuse. Yes I have a kid, A house arrest husband(WFH πŸ˜‰ ) and complete messy house with my lovely garden and my one only betta. But any of this is stopping me, no Not at all, at least my kid and husband wants me to send the desert island, where I can shout and they don’t have to listen πŸ™‚ So If I am saying I did not get the time I need to blame someone I am The Human I can not except that I am the reason.

That is correct I was little bit occupied but not that much. I did as per the daily routine and this time new things in the To Do list, I should have update my planner instead of that, I was keep doing as per the routine. That was my mistake, I must revise to my plans and accordingly we can make room for other things. It happens with everyone, Sometime we realize and correct it and other time we just keep doing it.

What it feels, as per mine, I feel frustrated because I am not able to complete my To Do list and the pile of pending things increased day by day. I want to finish up but things is not in my hand and then the world famous excuse I am not getting enough time. With all of this I learn two things, Time will not wait for you, So be with the time. and second Stop Excuses and Start Working.

How to utilize the time

Me and my kid during The lockdown

My son is 4 and half and till now I have a beautiful journey with him. The day I conceived till now I am learning, yes First time mother so every single thing is first, for each and everything I had questions, so whenever something happen during the pregnancy and after that (trust me a lot changes happen mentally and physically) I ask, some time I got answers and other time Google is my best friend. πŸ˜‰

I prefer The Learning word now and then. Because I believe everyone is a learner, at any place you are, You are a learner, when you are a individual person you live your life on your terms, no matter what is right or wrong. But when you become parent then whether you like it or not you become a role model. Whatever you do, your kid follow you, So now you can’t chose what to do and what not to.(scary, for me too πŸ˜›) .

For first year of kid life(after kid you don’t have lifeπŸ˜…) being a new parent you try to cope up and learn, there are lots of How in the first year, so you learn, Now you two are together, he knows you but you never know him, whenever you feel you know your kid and boom he did something new, so again learning, basically what I learn with this, It’s never ending, how about that, Make this learning as a fun learning.

If I need to be a role model (which I don’t like it), then let’s make some checkpoints, which gives win win situation.

I want my kid to be disciplined, but what is the meaning of that, he is about to 5 and he wants only play nothing else, he is meant for that, so what else can I expect from him. Disciplined is must and it should start around his age, so I make some ground rules like which is acceptable and which is not Like when my kid wakeup first thing brush without that you can’t come out of the room, applying this one is the hardest one because as he opens his eyes he likes to play. On the dinning table no dancing no funny business, at the time of study no naughty. And the last before sleeping brush. Other then that I say him No but all of them can be acceptable. I told you he knows me but i don’t know him, so daily me and my son have lots of discussions πŸ˜‰ someday I will share too. At this age I called as discipline.

Day by day he is growing and with this pandemic he is stuck in the home and if I make home as a jail so what he will do even kid can not express them selves. We are frustrated in the home so think about him, he wants garden, play area, friends but nothing. He wants to explore. I really feel sad for kids, any how we cope up but poor kids they try to understand but they can’t. So for this I change my self, I am kind of strict mother, but since lockdown started I changed, now I focus on my kid even my family mental health ( In my previous blog I shared for kids physical health), because now we are in close environment we have everything but virtual (still my family follows lock down restrictions) So in that situation being a parents we need to teach kids two main things Survival skills and No matter what is the condition always Be Positive.

For survival skills, everybody has different scenarios according to your geographical location, like for us, my son is dust allergic, heat issues, very sensitive body, So during the corona time we avoid every single thing which triggers any of that, Preventions is Better then Cure. With that concept we are teaching him what and how he needs to avoid those triggers, yes its a lot for him but day by day he is getting used to of it. when ever he feels hot he just come to me and ask for AC or after 10/15 sneeze he ask for nebulizer (which he calls as Mask medicine πŸ˜‰ ). Its good for him to understand his body at least he share with somebody else if I am not available. Scary but we need to make kids strong, yes we are always with them but they need to ready for new changes. My son he knows without mask can not go out and He is good in that, he never take out his mask, same way as we come home he direct go to washroom and wash him self and force us to do the same. Which I love it.

Other then all of the normal teaching, how to behave, how to talk, preschool learning one more thing I am trying to teach my kid is Be Positive, for him I say Be happy, and just focus on Today, learn from yesterday, Make To do list for tomorrow but live for Today. Its difficult for 4 year old to understand what I am saying, so I make an easy way, every single night I ask him what did you learn today, yesterday he told me he learn new word ‘Triumph’ and at other day he said I can make bubbles with mouth πŸ˜‰ so basically I am trying to teach him the concepts of learning from the Today, Not today but yes as he grows he will understand the concept, as for the To do list same I ask him what he is going to do after waking up and he told me whatever in his mind but same as time goes on he will have the real list ( now in his To do list only one thing Playing).

5 year old kid is still a baby, he is trying to understand the world in his ways, he need physically, mental growth and if we have limited recourse and we are having job, then we need a plan how to handle this. earlier kids go to school, they have friends, by watching them a lots of things they learn by them selves, now they have parents only and who is always stopping for everything, don’t do that ,don’t touch that and a lot and all day. So they start denying, my kid says ‘Still I am doing’ and some time I lose my control, some time I let it go, but that is not good, That’s why I came up with this idea, I make check list what is allow what is not and the most important his mental health. I want to make him happy but not stubborn. So here is my checklist as per my kid

  1. As you wakeup finish you washroom things.
  2. On the dining table no funny business.
  3. At the time of study no naughty things.
  4. Brush before sleeping.

Make some rules which gives idea what is accepted and what is not, other then that let him play, where kid can learn most of things, which helps for mental health as well as physical health.

2020 COVID-19 Pandemic kids health

Take Care of Each Other.

Why we need to share

Why Sharing

Welcome… It’s quite long I did not write anything, for me writing is expressing myself. Whenever a new thought pop up I just come here to share with you 😌 that’s the reason I chose my blog as a Thought Fountain, A beautiful flow of thoughts which is never ending.

Today when I was playing with my son and I got his favorite car. suddenly he resist and start fighting with me. he does not like to share his toys not even broken one . So I try to teach him the Concept of Sharing. Being a human most important concept and every single parents try to teach their kids and its good for them, good for society. When I try to explain him what is sharing and how good it is, he is simply denying with his one and only one logic “This Toy belongs to me why I should share”. when I say to him if he share other will share with you, so he replied back I don’t want their I want my toys. At last he wins and I decided to bring this topic at some other day,.

But this all gives me an idea or can say give me a Thought, When we were a kid we learn the same thing and some time we do share, but Think for a minute Do we really believe the concept of sharing. Yes we share, some time we share extra cloth, extra food, what ever we have old/extra/not in use things we just try to give it to some one(Even sharing this things is good, their are a lot of people they need them). We feel good with that, its good, With Nothing at least We are doing Something πŸ™‚ .

I read When we share joy we double the joy and when we share the sorrow we make it half. this is really true, we all experience that, if I talk about my self I was a introvert person, for me its difficut to talk about my fellings, I learn this thing frankly I learned this after my son because I dont want him like me, so I learn to share my self and still I am learing. Sharing joy is easy but sharing pain is difficult, I was/am scared of Judging. But yes when you start to express your self, not to others, to you, you see yourself a True person.

When we say Sharing, so its about everything, what we have we share. We share emotions with love ones, But when it comes to share Knowledge, we dont want to share, its not me its not you, its everyone, every single person does not like to share knowledge, we have insecurity, In work place( it can anything , office, collage, home) we feel if we share our knowledge that reduces the importance.

When ‘A’ join the office he attends all his trainings but still he is struggling, why because colleague does not wants to share all the details, a simple excuse I learn with the effort so ‘A’ also need to be, rather if that guy thinks I learnt with effort so lets share my experienced so ‘A’ will not have struggle and he can learn furthermore instead of try to learn basic. I have lots of example, it happen every where in home, in school, it happened with you, even you did with some body, I did when I was in school, so yes I am also like you.

Does it really true, Sharing Knowledge can reduces the importance, No, not true at all, even not in the workplace, not any other place ,yes it may possible some people can misuse, like you share your knowledge and they take all credit but it can not possible all the time, reason behind is that when you share your experience at that moment you get some new concepts you live that moment again and then you got new prospective for that, like third person, So your knowledge comeback to you in new form and gives the new idea, it happens with me, when ever I write and share something from my life, I see like a third person, which helps me to broaden my thinking.

“Your thinking will always be limited to your own opinions and experience,” says Alexandra Damsker. “So expand your worldview, experience, and opinions as much as possible.” when we share we got different views for the same thing, which gives new ways to look.

Share your knowledge and Enhance to each other. simple but effective, just we need to apply in our life. πŸ™‚

Love to hear you back πŸ™‚